forgive me blogger, for I have sinned

I was really iffy on wether or not I would even post this, but after some time to think it through I figured what the hell. It's my blog and hiding the truth isn't going to change it.

I have been eating 100% paleo / clean for a little over a month now. The gains have been astronomical and since late December I have lost 12lbs (142 - 130) while still gaining muscle. The changes in my body are insane. While exercise has a lot to do with it, clean eating has been the moving force behind everything.

With the obligatory positive intro in place, it is now time to get to the nitty gritty.
Lately I have been craving some of my old favorites like MAD. I felt like if I didn't figure something in, I was going to give up and go back to my old habits. My solution is one many of you will scoff at - a 3 day cheat.

I chose to space my cheat over such a long time period because there were a lot of foods that I'd been craving and I wanted to satisfy all my itches (I know, not really reasonable) and I wanted to make sure that I was doing it in the healthiest way possible as opposed to one uber binge-fest (I have issues with binge eating and hope it is something I never do again).

Friday:
Throughout the day, I had a granola bar, 5 junior mints and kraft dinner.

Saturday:
Throughout the day I had hawaiian pizza, a chocolate chip muffin and an ice cap.

Sunday:
Throughout the day I had bread and butter, a poutine, and a cream egg.

Although I don't track, I did this weekend and kept in my calories each day. I made sure that everything I ate that wasn't a specific cheat that I had allowed myself was extremely high quality.

I exercised Friday and Sunday, but needed to keep at least one weekend rest day.

My findings:
Things taste different now, not as good as I remember (although many still yummy) and not as satisfying. Especially with the ice cap I had a HUGE energy burst - often resulting in me behaving like a buffoon in public - and then a massive carby crash. After each thing I got a little nauseaus, and especially the pizza almost made me vomit.

I will report at the end of the week on wether this was a good idea that curbed my cravings or not, and wether it had a large negative effect on my weight and fitness.

Although the paleo challenge I'm in is still on, when it ends on March 5th I think I will introduce a cheat meal once per week so that I don't feel the need to do something as drastic and likely damaging as what I did this weekend was.

What Worked:
- spreading out the 'cheats' to avoid a binge
- consuming high quality foods for everything aside from the cheats
- exercising: I feel this helped offset the carb crash just a little bit

What Didn't Work:
- eating so much garbage in a short time has me feeling a little sick
- doing it while still being in the paleo competition, lol
- one of the main authors on the paleo diet says that you can see the benefits of paleo by eating 100% paleo 80% of the time. I think cutting out everything is a great plan, but being the weak-willed woman I am it is important to have more foresight than I had in this past month.

Another thing:
Hubby and I weren't supposed to see each other this weekend. He got back from the field late Friday and the weather was so bad I asked him not to come down. But then Saturday while on my way to the school library to do some work, I turned right instead of left. Then left instead of right. And soon I was on my way to his town. 4 hours later I was there with little more than a couple of school books. I have a key to his room so I hid in a corner and asked him to go to his room and see if he could find something I left there. Scared the poop out of him - was awesome. It was nice to do something spontaneous and see the look on his face when I got there. It made me feel so special to see how happy I could make him, and I made him feel special as well by surprising him by doing a four hour drive just so we could spend 24 hours together. Well worth it. I look forward to next weekend (he'll be turning the big 2-7!) and we'll be able to spend the whole thing together.

what do you think of the cheat weekend - good or bad? what would you change? is it possible to eat 100% clean 100% of the time?

I'm thinking I might get a new asshole with this one ;)

I am disgusting

Tonight was a binge but unfortunately, no, thats not where the 'disgusting' comes from. I was cleaning out my freezer and 'indulged' on some old ass breaded chicken and mozza sticks. Not so bad right? They were freezer burned to hell and seriously GOD AWFUL. So what did I do? I threw them out I ate them all. I'm not overall concerned with calories because in terms of size, it wasn't great but it wasn't the worst binge. I did crossfit yesterday, p90x yoga today, and I have crossfit again tomorrow morning. I'm scared though that I'm going to get food poisoning and I'm supposed to get a tattoo tomorrow. I am STUPID. But that also seriously demonstrates the lack of control in regards to a binge. Reason wasn't there anymore.

C'est la vie. Time to move on.

*I was going to post a picture of what a cheese stick SHOULD look like, but I don't wanna make anyone feel tempted!

update on last night

Ya I binged. Kept it in my calorie count though, tracked it all (thanks to the suggestion in my comments that I track online). Amazing, before I would have binged on chocolate or chips, but since I'd cut out grains (my favorite food) I wanted them so bad I just had some crackers, pickles, cereal and pasta salad (and by JUST i mean JUST had a lot). I used a small plate, moved to a different floor to eat, and generally tried to slow the binge as much as I could. C'est la vie. On another note, this is awesome and true:

Picture from EatBigGetBig.com

* NOTE: Please don't think I don't value yoga and the other exercises at the top of the pyramid, I think they're great it their own right!

crossfit du jour

WARM UP:
5 min double unders
20 squats
20 supermans
20 sit ups

Skill:
5 sets 3 thrusters working from low weight up to 3 rep max.

W.O.D.
21 thrusters
500m row
18 thrusters
500m row
15 thrusters
500m row

Weight: 45lbs
Time: 17:01

THRUSTER + PROPER TECHNIQUE

did you work out today?

tell me about it!

Words of wisdom from Erin's 6 Month Transformation



" I blog to hold myself accountable for my actions, and so that you will too. I expect that if I'm making the same mistakes over and over again, someone will point it out. If I'm making excuses, I want someone to call me out. I want to be held accountable for the setbacks I have caused myself. I have a habit of posting about the good stuff and not always the bad stuff because I'm embarrassed, but how are you supposed to hold me accountable if I don't? I strive to be more open with any setbacks. I hope you will do the same."

mamacita est un idota

The title of this post should tell you two things about me.
1.) I don't speak Spanish.
2.) I am an idiot.

During yesterdays crossfit workout I used 100lbs for my deadlifts. This would be fine if we were doing only a few reps. We did 55. I know I shouldn't be doing 100lbs but I did it anyway. Near the end I could feel my back curling, and I knew I was losing my form. I tried to pretend I didn't notice, but I was even 'subconsciously' waiting until my trainer wasn't looking to do my lifts and powering them out of the way before she looked back (at this point in the workout I was only doing 5 or less at a time). Guess what?

My back hurts like hell. I had to forgo boxing tonight because I want to be able to do my W.O.D. tomorrow. I'll wait it out to see if it's an injury or just soreness. I don't think I'm broken, but I think I'm pretty damn close and it is sincerely due to my own stupidity. I don't get down on myself often but I'm pretty upset. I knew better, I know better, this shouldn't have happened.

Tonight I did one hour of hatha yoga. I explained my situation and he gave me different moves to do in places that may hurt or strain my back, like the rounded back toe touches. He also suggested I do some cow-cat in the morning what I wake up to loosen myself up for the day. I couldn't thank him enough for all of that. Afterwards I drove over to crossfit and used their foam rollers and lacrosse balls to try and work out some of the tension. So thats a warning: If you're going to be an idiot and let your form go shitty, you'll have to go embarrass yourself rolling around like a moron in front of a bunch of on ramp people. God I hope I didn't make them all think "pshh.. if she doesn't crossfit I don't wanna do crossfit".

I have been eating clean so far this week. I even asked hubby if we could make an effort to eat clean when he comes down tomorrow. He loved the idea and is pretty excited, he bought a pineapple and some other yummy things to bring with him. I've been using MyFitnessPal and I'm rarely coming in over 1000cal, and haven't hit more than 1200 this week. It keeps warning me that I'm risking putting my body into starvation mode. I don't think I believe it. I've been eating really high quality foods and not denying myself - if I'm hungry I eat. I guess we'll see.

I haven't been drinking enough water. I know this. The only time I get in my 8 cups is when I'm working out, and then I need even more. I've been dehydrated since Monday. I've even had a couple of gatorades during longer workouts and nothing much is changing. If anyone has any tips on how they manage to keep their consumption up, please let me know, thanks!

short update on the challenge

Clean eating?
Naw. No excuses either, I had opportunity today to make healthy choices and time to workout but I stayed curled up on the sofa. I was telling myself I'm trying to enjoy the last of my vacation but the truth of the matter is that this will all be a lot harder to do when I get back to school.
I only share these failures to keep myself accountable, both to the Spring Chicks and to myself and my health.
On the bright side I am really looking forward to starting crossfit up again this coming week. Here's hoping next update comes with tales of success! xx

- DS

home sweet home

After a long and, frankly, wonderful vacation, I am finally back to my apartment. Hubby will be here with me until Sunday. Yesterday was pretty hectic, packing all of our clothes and Christmas presents, getting here, unpacking, cleaning out all of the old food, replacing it, cleaning up the house, etc. etc.

My parents are coming in their truck to deliver my beer fridge from residence as my apartment is very small and only came with a beer fridge, hot plate, toaster oven, etc. so I find I don't have enough place to store food. Hubby decided he'd be cooking for my parents and is trying out his new slow cooker and is making beef burritos and maple meatballs. I can't stop eating the meatballs, I've been sneaking them all day. They are AMAZING!

I finally got to try out my juicer. I'd wanted to since I opened it Christmas day but decided I'd wait until I was home. I got that cute little container at the dollar store. I cannot believe how amazing fresh juice tastes. I'm really lucky that I got this baby.

Eating has been okay. I've been tracking but since most everything that is homemade that I'm eating is not the healthiest of food, I'm afraid that the calorie suggestions on MyFitnessPal aren't all that accurate. At least I'm always trying to chose the highest one to play it safe.

Now that I'm back in my apartment there really are no excuses. I'm going to re-evaluate my new school schedule and workout when I'm going to be getting in my crossfit workouts + workouts at the gym + doing p90x videos at home. It seems crazy tight but in reality if I start getting my butt out of bed before, say, 1 in the afternoon I'll have hours of free time that I didn't have before. Looking forward to my Sunday night weigh in and setting good, solid goals for the week.

tracking my food: a love (hate) story

I've kept up with tracking my food the last two days as was my goal.
Yesterday was great.
Today I binged on 800 calories worth of mini eggs.
Its okay because I made no dietary commitments this week, and I can see a source of my bad habits. If I'm going to indulge I have to buy the smallest possible portion and I have to commit to throwing out the rest as soon as I feel I'm done.
Lesson learned.

Somehow I still managed to stay within my 1450 calorie limit, but thats assuming I don't eat again tonight.

Welp, no excuses and no regrets. I'm learning.

My Intentions

Why I Made This Blog

I spent a lot of 2011 trying to work out more and trying to be a better student. The fact of the matter is I know I am capable of more and I want to make myself accountable to that. That is how I found my way over here (where apparently I already had an account for some other purpose long forgotten). I don't want to lose weight in an unhealthy way, and I don't have a huge goal, number-wise. What I want to do is exercise, eat clean and put in the effort to become not only fit but strong.

Who I Am

I am a 21 year old female university student. History is my major. I am engaged to a wonderful man who is a soldier in the army. I like to read and daydream about being fit.

My "stats"

21 year old female

5"3'

140 lbs

what else goes here?

My Goals

There is still time and so these may be tweaked a little.

Short Term:

- continue to xfit three times a week.

- join boxing club, do that two times a week

- go to yoga at least once a week

- run at least three times a week

- do homework at least one hour a night

Long Term:

- run an easy 5k in under 30 minutes

- quit smoking FOR GOOD, no weekend smoking

- pick up a hobby (probably knitting) so you aren't snacking at night.

- get rid of belly fat, maintain

- reward self with new tattoo(s)

Let this be the start of exactly what I need!